speeding.

well, I was caught for speeding yesterday when I was on my way back to campus.
haha.
During the study break I remembered I just promised myself that I will need to reduce my driving speed.
and now, after the study break, this is what happened.
sarcastic, isn't it?

well, well, well.
just laugh at me. =)
I still remember I was on the 2nd lane and the car in front was driving quite slow.
I asked myself, should I just go to the fast lane and drive faster? <--- everything started with this thought.
at last, I changed to the fast lane and just drove at the speed of 110km/h.
[yea, the policeman claimed that I was at 110km/h but I think it was only about 100km/h. blah. it's the same when the speed limit is only 80km/h]

by the time I saw the road block, I felt damn guilty.
I know I was going to get it.
and well, I GOT IT!
the rest of the story?
I think you know it. =)

you know what was my first thought when the policeman asked me to stop my car?
"oh gosh. I'm gonna face it all on my own"
unlike the time when people hit my car another day, I have somebody to seek for help. [my dad and my bro]
yea. I told myself,
"yea. gonna face it ALL on my own"

when I was let go. my hands were seriously still shaking.
because I was scared and frightened.

yea. laugh at me.
I know I'm a piece of useless shit.
but I'm just being honest.
I WAS REALLY SCARED!

I called my best friend - ahmuk immediately after that.
the first question she asked was, "hey jhen, are you crying?"
how lovely is my muk muk.
she knows me really well.
but, I'm proud to say, not a single tear dropped.
=)

argh. laugh again at me.
I know I'm useless.
I know blocking by the police is no big deal.
but I can seriously and honestly tell you, I WAS REALLY SCARED.

I feel damn guilty now.
not because of the amount of coffee money I spent on. <-- I'm rather sad than guilty for this.
is because I feel damn guilty to my parents.
dad bought me a car, and I was speeding with it.
mom gave me pocket money and I just lost it, just like this. =(
PAPA MAMA, I'M REALLY SORRY! >.<

I know I have weird thinkings.
think whatever you would like to think.
this is my blog and I'm expressing myself.
=P
phew. very much relieved now.